Jason's Realization
by GrimliFiendish
Summary: A series of one shot's I am tentatively calling Jason's Realization, if done right all will be done with Jason's being the main POV and all will be connected and each title and song inspired by a song something I do all the time anyway. This could be a short series or lengthy depending on how each one-shot goes and inspiration.
1. What Could Have Been Love

What Could Have Been Love

Synopsis: Jason is on his way back to Rosewood after the girls bring Alison home. He hasn't been back since shortly after Ali's disappearances and a realization he had about his feelings for Aria. He comes home for his sister and to get the girl, but has he put it off for too long.

Characters: Jason DiLaurentis, Aria Montgomery, Alison DiLaurentis, Spencer Hastings, Jessica DiLaurentis

Song Inspiration: What Could Have Been Love by Aerosmith

Pairings: Jason/Aria Ezra/Aria Jason/Melissa (mentioned) Jason/Cece (mentioned, she's not mentioned by name)

❤️Could Have Been Love❤️  
Jason has been up for the last two days trying to get back to Rosewood. His parents called him three days ago. Alison was home. her friends hadn't given even when everyone else thought Alison was dead, they continued, never accepting her death and they had been right.

Jason had been gone for too long, and he hoped he hadn't left something for too late. He had run away after Alison's disappearance after a night spent in Aria's arms. He ran away more frightened than he ever had been in his life. Running away from what could have been the love of his life, staring him right in the face. He only hoped he hadn't left things too late because he wasn't going back to Rosewood just for Alison he was going back for Aria.

**Two and a half years earlier**  
He had been sitting on his steps feeling worthless, the police had come to question Jason and his parents again about the night of Alison's disappearance his parents were out of town for the night and he still could remember nothing. He had been so wasted that night and almost every other night he barely remembers anything about the past year.

The girl he had been dating broke up with him the morning after Alison's disappearance and while that made him upset, really, he didn't remember a whole lot about their relationship, it wasn't like it had been really serious, they had only kissed a few times. The thing he remembers the most was the color pink or more specifically pink hair. And he had been thinking about that pink hair when Aria Montgomery walked toward him that night as he sat there so lost wondering if he had hurt his own sister.

"Hey." she said shifting nervously, stuffing her hands in the back pockets of well-worn denim shorts as if not knowing what to do, "Um, I just wanted to check and see how you were doing?" she said a hand coming out of a back pocket to pushing a pink lock behind a dainty ear nervously, her face turning almost the same shade of pink as the lock of hair as she looked down at her tiny feet with black painted toenails encased in black flip flops. She picked an imaginary piece of lint from Joey Ramone emblazoned on her black t-shirt before nervously playing with her rings and black leather bracelet she was wearing.

Jason had never talked to Aria much or any of Alison's Power Puff friends, but she had always been his favorite, thinking she had more substance than the rest of the girls. She was the only one to come over and check on him since Ali's disappearance.

He had started to tell her he was fine, but much to his embarrassment a huge sob escaped his throat and the next thing he knew Aria was standing between his legs bending to hug him tightly. At first, he stiffened up, this was the first comfort anyone had given him since Ali had disappeared. Honestly, it was the first time anyone had showed concern for him or offered him comfort in years.

Jason found himself pulling the young girl tightly to his body his head buried in her stomach as he sobbed for his missing sister, for the lost memories and for himself and his parents. Aria ran soothing hands through his hair not saying a word just being there for him.

They stayed like that for some time until the fury of Jason's emotions passed leaving him exhausted both emotionally and physically. He thought he would be embarrassed after the meltdown, but he wasn't. For some reason, he felt safe with her and looked up at her, green eyes still wet with tears. There was no pity in her eyes as she looked down at him; only a shared pain, empathy, concern and a look Jason couldn't quiet define, but it was it was a look of longing and need. His eyes were reflecting that same need and longing, he just didn't know it.

Aria stood in the circle of his arms looking down at him, her fingers combing through his hair in a soothing manner her expression gentle. She didn't say a word, she didn't have to, it was as though at this moment in time words were unnecessary between them. Aria lean down placing her lips on his in an intimate, but innocent caress. Jason's lips parted beneath her closed one and his tongue came out tracing the seam made by her closed lips seeking refuge inside and Aria parted her lips welcoming him. With a choked sigh, Jason's eyes closed, one hand moved to the back of her head his long fingers combing through the long silky tresses, guiding her closer to his questing lips.

He didn't care that anyone could see them, all he cared about at that moment was the girl in his arms and the comfort and strength he was pulling from her. He had notice Aria when he came home at the beginning of summer, before she had just been his sister's friend, they were all growing up, but unlike other Rosewood girls she always done the unexpected, like the dark pink streaks in her hair and showing compassion for him.

Jason tightened his arm around her waist pulling her body as close as he could to his own until she was kneeling on the step below the one he was sitting on, her body arched into his and her arms firmly locked around his neck her fingers threading though his hair, his kiss deepening and her response as natural as if they had kissed many times before today.

Jason finally pulled away from her looking into dark hazel eyes with his own searching green, long fingers of one hand gently traced the delicate lines of her face and kiss swollen lips before standing to his feet. Aria looked up at him a questioning look in her eyes, Jason bent down kissing her forehead. "Come on." Tugging on her hand indicating that she should follow him inside as the dusk of the evening settled around them.

Jason wasn't thinking of her age, or her lack of experience, he was only thinking that he needed her with him tonight. Maybe it was selfish on his part, but it had been so long since he felt like he mattered or that anyone cared. Aria had made him feel like that tonight and he didn't want to lose that feeling yet.

Aria followed after a small hesitation. Jason led her up the front steps and across the porch before pulling her inside the house. Aria started to turn toward the living room only for Jason to pull her toward the steps leading to the upstairs to his bedroom. he led her down the hall through the door at the very end. Aria looked around in surprise, she had never been in his bedroom before. It was nothing like she pictured it to be. Based on Alison's depiction of her brother she had expected it to be painted black, cluttered with beer bottles, porn magazines and dirty clothes covering every surface. but it wasn't like that at all, it was clean with very little clutter.

The walls were painted pale gray, the queen-sized bed had a tall wooden head board and the matching furniture in charcoal gray, the bed spread and curtains were also charcoal, accent pillow were pale gray, charcoal and teal striped with a cushion laying on the floor were teal as was the throw thrown haphazardly on the foot of the bed. There were black wrought iron lamps on lamps with teal and charcoal striped lampshades one bedside tables one of the had an alarm clock and stack of CD's that obviously belonged in built in shelves surrounding a stereo system complete with a record and cassette player there were shelves of CD's, vinyl records and even cassette tapes.

On one wall by a window was a computer desk above that was a built book case crammed full of well read books, the table was cluttered with a camera and equipment, a drawing pad and pencils. Aria walked over to look at the books on the shelf. There was several by Ray Bradbury that she loved, as well as some Hemingway, Lovecraft and Poe He had Lord of the Flies, Frankenstein, Dracula, Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, some Sherlock Holmes and the Odyssey stuffed in among Stephen King, Dean Koontz and William Johnstone. Aria smiled when she saw a copy of Pride and Prejudice one of her favorites and she couldn't help the giggle that escaped when she noticed a well-read copy of Green Eggs and Ham by Dr. Seuss. For some reason his bookshelf seemed to give a lot of insight to the man whose room she was standing in.

On the wall were black and white photographs tastefully framed in weathered antique gray wood frames. She recognized places in a couple of the photos and knew they were taken by Jason. She had never realized how talented of a photographer he was. Hanging over his bed was a picture of a girl with dark hair blowing in the breeze hiding her face from view as she stood overlooking a body of water, beside it was two smaller pictures of the same girl, her face still hidden from view: in one her back was to the photographer, she was looking over her shoulder at someone and you could imagine her laughing and in the other one she was looking down at the ground one hand pushing hair behind her ear.

Aria wondered who the girl was and if the photographer had feeling for her. Aria had no clue she was the girl in the pictures, and that the photographer had feeling for her, but didn't realize it yet. They had been taken at the lake last summer. Jason had brought his camera and Alison had demanded Jason take pictures of her and the girls and wouldn't leave him alone until he agreed. He had taken the pictures of aria after Alison's impromptu photo shoot.

He was looking for interesting shots and come across Aria in a world of her own and he had been unable to resist to take the pictures of the unguarded moment she had never known her was there and she had never turned her face toward him which only added an element of mystery to the pictures. Once he developed them he had given all of them to Alison, except these, for some reason he had been compelled to keep them himself; only he knew who the girl was or that he was the photographer.

Jason watched as Aria looked around his room with curiosity. He thought she had been in here snooping with Alison a few times, but now he was certain she had never been in his room until now. He walked up behind her and put his arms around her waist, resting his chin her shoulder as she looked through his music collection.

Aria was surprised to see music by members of the Rat Pack, Louis Armstrong, Johnny Cash, Etta James, Leonard Cohen and Elvis Presley. She also noticed he had blues, classic rock and even a few swing/big band albums, but most of his music was stuff she knew Jason listened to classic alternative, punk, post-punk, ska and metal since she would hear it coming from his room during sleepovers at Alison's over the years. Most of the time she preferred his music to what Alison and the girls listened to. P!nk was about the only music the girls listened to that Aria actually liked, usually they listened Justin Bieber, Selena Gomez, Taylor Swift, Beyoncé and Katy Perry as well as a few others that weren't really Aria's taste. She was so sick of Party in the USA she could vomit every time it came on.

"You've always had better taste in music than the girls." She told him, "I strain my ears trying to hear your music over the crap Ali and the girls always want to listen to." she said with a small laugh that died in her throat when she remembered that Alison had disappeared and no one knew where she was at or if she was even alive. Aria bit her lip blinking back tears as she turned around facing Jason again. "I'm sorry." She looked up at him and she could see the worry on his face.

"You know, it's okay to say her name, Aria. I know you miss her." he said wanting to comfort the girl in his arms.

He had a sad smile on his face, his eyes looked tired and sunken in, underneath the bottomless green pools were dark shadows and bags. Aria pulled his head down and kissed under each eye and then pulled his head into her shoulder, they stood there like that until a few minutes later Jason lifted her tiny frame until she was eye level with him her arms tightened around his shoulders and her legs came up wrapping around his waist for added support.

Jason placed his lips against hers moving in a gentle caress the tip of his tongue barely touching her lips before they parted the tip of her tongue meeting his in a gentle caress, their lips moving together in a tender, but passionate kiss. Jason's hands moved under the t shirt caressing the silky skin beneath before laying her back against the soft material of his bedspread. He followed placing his elbows on the mattress to support some of his weight and continued to kiss her over and over her mouth widened for him and he deepened the kiss. it wasn't until Jason's hand moved under her shirt, his fingers moving beneath the smooth material of her bra cupping a bare breast that Aria showed any signs of hesitation when she stiffened and Aria moaned in protest, Jason thought about what he was doing and who he was doing it with. He immediately stopped pulling his hand from beneath her bra and top. She was fifteen not some college girl he had randomly picked up. He wanted more, but this couldn't happen even if she hadn't stopped him.

Aria looked away in embarrassment and stumbled an apology. "You don't have anything to apologize for Aria, I shouldn't have done that. I got carried away because," what was he supposed to say, because that was usually the typed of girls he was with, or because he got carried away when she had showed him she cared about him and he was starved for affection, both were true and both made him sound completely pathetic., "well, I just forgot myself, I'm the one whose sorry."

Aria blushed, but smiled at him and told him that she had gotten carried away too. Jason stifled a groan. He had thought Aria had gotten over her crush a couple years earlier, but he could see in her eyes that she still had a crush on him, a complication he did not need. "I guess I should go." Aria sitting up, but Jason stopped her completely contradicting his thought that he did not need this complication. He should have just let her go, but he couldn't.

He didn't want to be alone again, "Stay with me." he said in an almost pleading tone. "I promise I won't do anything like that again." how could he tell her he was afraid to be alone because every time he closed his eyes he seen that note and heard Alison begging him for help but he was too stoned to do anything just lay there as she was being dragged away; or that for the first time in a long time she made him feel like he wasn't completely worthless and unwanted.

"I have to be home by nine so I will stay as long as I can. Ever since ..."she stopped, Jason knew it was because of Alison, her friend's parents were afraid of losing their own daughters, "umm, well lately my parents have wanted me home at night so I'm not allowed to spent the night with anywhere." Aria moved to lay back down beside him and held her arms open and Jason lay back down, his arms going around her his head moving to the crook of her shoulder. Jason closed his eyes and in a tired voice told her he would take her home when she was ready. Wrapped in her arms he falls asleep almost immediately.

Aria caressed the blonde head that had moved to her chest nuzzling his face into her breast, they weren't exactly big, but that didn't seem to bother the guy asleep in her arms as he sighed in contentment. Aria stayed until eight thirty and then she carefully crawled out of Jason's bed and found her flip flops. She leaned over and brushed a tender kiss on his forehead and whispered, "I love you Jason." She didn't have the heart to wake him so she flipped off his light and crept quietly down the steps, turned the knob so it would lock automatically and left the house silently.

Jason didn't wake up until the next morning and for the first time in a long time he didn't have a hangover and felt well rested. His mind went back to the night before and he reached for the girl who had been there for him when he needed someone, but the bed was empty. He sat up quickly and looked around, he ran downstairs, but she was gone.

He freaked out, for the first-time Jason realized he had fallen for Aria and it couldn't be more inappropriate. She was one Alison's best friend. He had let Alison down when she needed him, he didn't even know if he had something to do with her disappearance and she hated him, she had lived to humiliate and blackmail him and this would have been more ammunition to use against him if she were still here. It was bad enough that Aria was one of Alison's best friends, but she was fifteen and he was twenty.

That day Jason loaded up what he could in his car and hadn't looked back not even coming home for Alison's funeral. He signed himself into rehab and finished college. After that he went to work for Carissimi' a family owned company with their charity side. He worked with so many people who were victims of famine, drought, catastrophes and war, people who had faced problems so much bigger then he could dream of that it put life in perspective and helped keep him clean as he had been ever since that night Aria showed up at his parents' house offering him compassion and even though he ran from it her love.

That was his first night of sobriety, he had never even thanked her. Like a coward, he had run afraid to face the feelings that had probably been developing since he first met her when she was eleven, not long before his sixteenth birthday. He hadn't been ready for this realization. He had never even had a serious girlfriend and the thought that he was could be falling for Aria scared the hell out him. He wasn't ready for any commitments, he still had things he wanted to do before he ever thought of settling down with one girl, especially when the girl wasn't even old enough to drive.

**Present**

He had been overseas when his mother, Jessica contacted him with the news, "Jason, she's home. Our girl is alive, she is home." he didn't get to ask many questions or talk to Alison since it was a poor connection. It had taken him three days to get home, but he had talked to his mother when he landed earlier and found out that it had been her friends who brought her home. Jason pulled up in the driveway and Alison rushed out the door, she had been waiting for him and threw her arms around his neck. "Oh, my god, Jason!" she said tears filling her eyes, "I never thought I would get to see you again. I have so many things I have to tell you, there are so many things you have to know."

Alison and Jason stayed up for most of the night talking and when he got up the next morning it was to find the girls at his house just like old times. His eyes went to Aria and he felt his heart pounding, but she turned her head away. Feelings of disappointment, sorrow and guilt welled up deep inside. He had to talk to her and explain why he had left. It wasn't until later that afternoon he had a chance to catch her alone.

"Aria?"

"Oh, hey Jason." She said looking down at her feet.

"I need to talk to you." He pleaded

"Really?" She said looking at him, her eyes guarded.

Jason ran his hands through his hair that he had gotten cut the morning after he landed, the shorter length still odd to him. He had wanted to look decent when he seen Her. He needed to be cool and take it slow, it had been almost over 2 years since he had run away and he needed to give her time, they needed to get to know each other again.

"Aria, I care about you I always have, more than I should have actually, but the timing was wrong. I've tried to forget you, but I can't. I have to know it there is a chance you care about me?" she looked at him with a stunned expression. He hadn't meant to say that yet, but it was too late and he just acted on his feelings. He cupped her jaw and moved toward her angling her mouth to his and kissed her slowly not unlike the first time they kissed and she responded just as naturally as she had that night, her hands moving to his shoulders clutching the tightly. He moaned, for the first time in so long he felt complete, he deepened the kiss only for her to push him away.

"I can't do this." She said shaking her head trying to clear the fog, he couldn't just come back into her life after more than two years and expect to pick up where they left off as if nothing had happened. "We can't do this"

"Why not?" He knew he had a lot to explain, but this felt right and he knew she felt it too.

"I can't do this because I am unavailable, I have a boyfriend that loves me, one who almost died trying to help us get Alison back. We can't do this because you left. You didn't even tell me goodbye, I went to your house the next day to check on you. I asked to talk to you when your mom answered the door and she looked at me with pity and told me you went back to college. I felt so stupid, I thought that night meant something and you just took off and I never heard from you again. You can't just show up and think that we can be together now that it is convenient for you." she walked away from him and Jason stood there fighting back tears.

After everything that had happened with Alison and the secrets their parents realized she knew they came clean with him, Melissa and Spencer and told them that Peter was his father. Melissa hadn't taken the news well, but it hadn't been easy for him either. Finding out he had made out with his half-sister a few times wasn't exactly a highlight in his life. Spencer wanted to get to know her brother and have a relationship even if Peter was discouraging it.

A few weeks later Jason was at the mall with Alison and Spencer helping them pick out formals for the winter dance at school. It wasn't his idea of fun, but it made them happy. He was waiting for them when he seen Aria with man with dark hair and wearing a sweater vest. Spencer came out of the dressing room and seen who Jason was looking at.

"That is Ezra, Aria's boyfriend. He helped us get Alison back." Spencer told him, " They have gone through so much they are meant to be together." Spencer went in to try on another dress not realizing that her words had broken Jason with a feeling of defeat he turned his attention back to the couple. Aria was looking straight at him with a look of longing and desire that matched his own. And he knew Aria was in love with him, he wasn't sure why she was with Ezra Fitz, but Jason DiLaurentis came to a decision. He was fighting for Aria and when he got her, he was never letting her go again.

Fin

Notes: I wanted Jessica to be alive, I missed her after her death. Also, Ezra did stalk the girls and date her for the book, but I am not sure if they know this yet or not in my story. Aria is in love with Jason still, but was hurt when he ran off and Ezra did get shot helping them get Ali back so there is a sense of obligation, the ending needs work, but I wanted to get it up for feedback purposes and suggestions. Aria's Joey Ramona outfit is posted below

This started out as a one-shot, but someone suggested I consider a sequel, this is the first story in a series of one shot's I am tentatively calling Jason's Realization if done right all will be done with Jason's being the main POV and all will be connected, this could be a series of five or fifty-one-shots, depending on how each play out as inspiration hits, I am not a planner almost anything I write is flow of consciousness so the only thing planned is that Jaria eventually get together.

Kisses  
GrimLi


	2. Hole in My Soul

Synopsis: Jason is still dealing with the fall out of running away a couple years earlier.

Characters: Jason, Aria, Ezra, Alison, Spencer, Hanna, Emily, Holbrook, Caleb, Paige, Toby, Noel

Pairings: Jason/Aria (obviously, sexual tension and attraction) Ezra/Aria Spencer/Toby, Emily/Paige, Hanna/Caleb, Alison/Noel (flirtation only)

This is a sequel to What Could Have Been Love,

Song inspiration: Hole in My Soul by Appocalyptica

This dedicated to Heathersun.

Hole in My Soul  
It had been two weeks since Jason had seen Aria with Ezra Fitz at the mall. He had seen Aria a few times since then, but other than a polite greeting she never talked to him and definitely made sure she was never alone with him. Since then he had found out more about Ezra Fitz, thanks to Spencer who knew the whole story.

Aria had met him in a bar, only to find out the next day he was her English teacher, her parents disapproved of the relationship and they didn't even know everything. Spencer stopped short of telling him everything. but she told him that they had broken up over something Aria had found out. After he was shot and almost died trying to help them the night they got Alison back, how could Aria not realize how much he loved her and that other stuff didn't matter anyway. It was just one of the obstacles they had overcome to be together.

Jason noticed that Alison had been extremely quiet and couldn't quiet meet his eyes when the subject of Ezra Fitz came up. Did she have a crush on him? He couldn't quiet figure out Alison's reaction and it was not the only time he would notice her looking away or that her body stiffened when Ezra's name came up. As for Aria what had she found out about Ezra that would cause her to break up with him until he got shot, and would cause further disapproval if her parents found out? Was she only with him out of obligation, because she felt like she owed him because he was shot? Jason wished he had all the answers, but he knew he wasn't being told everything and what he had been told wasn't helping him.

There had been a piece missing in his life since the day he ran away from his feelings for her. When he first got back and seen his sister and then learning about Spencer had filled that void some, but the hole in his life seemed to be enlarging again without Aria, and her avoidance of him was only making it worse. If only he could go back and change the way he had handled things after the night. He didn't regret what he had done, only how he had done it. Getting clean and finding a purpose, were things he had to do for himself and for her. His regret was not saying goodbye.

He wished he would have explained that he was leaving because he needed to get himself together. If only he would have done something besides run away and leave Aria behind thinking what that night had meant nothing. That evening, the compassion and acceptance she had given him had healed something inside him and he hadn't even thanked her. So many times, since coming back he had tried talking to her, but she wouldn't talk to him. So often he had almost given up hope and then he would catch her looking at him with the same emotion he was sure was reflected in his own eyes. Seeing her with Ezra felt like a thorn was in his heart working its way deeper and it killed a piece of him a little each time.

Tonight, was one of those nights. Still leery of Alison being alone without her family present his parents had insisted that Jason escort Alison to the winter dance much to her chagrin. Jason wasn't exactly pleased about it either as it meant he was forced to be near Aria and Ezra all night. She had taken his breath away when she walked in wearing a pale blue outfit even in a sea of girl's dressed white, silver and blue she still stood out to him.

As usual she was coldly polite when she seen him sitting at their table flanked by a sister on each side. As if to drive home the fact that she was with Ezra, she was being extremely clingy. Not being able to hold her was gut wrenching, but seeing her in Ezra's arms and watching as she smiled up at him her arms clasped tight around his neck was almost more than he could take. Jason would have bought her act if he had not seen her staring at him her eyes burning like embers when she thought no one was watching her and that was the only thing holding him together right now; though, in some ways, it made things worse. Knowing she had feelings for him gave him hope; however, when he thought about why she was ignoring those feelings, helplessness eclipsed any hope he had.

Jason was deep in thought as he sat at the table. Alison was chatting away to Noel Khan, the two of them had rekindling their friendship and a mild flirtation they had always engaged in. Spencer and Toby were on the dance floor. Emily and Paige were talking to fellow students on the swim team. Hanna was chatting to agent Holbrook who had been assigned to keep an eye on Alison. His sisters' friend was dating Caleb, but it she was obvious she had a crush on the FBI agent, who took it for what it was, a schoolgirl crush and handled the situation delicately. It was hard not to feel sorry for the teenaged boy as he stood with puppy dog eyes watching Hanna batting brilliant blue eyes at Holbrook. Finally, Aria and Ezra were on the dance floor and had been for most of the night.

Jason lifted defeated eyes to the girl that should have been with him and once again she was looking at him over her boyfriend's shoulder. When she noticed him looking back at her she tried to turn her eyes away from him, but she couldn't seem to look away. Jason was doing his best to convey every feeling he had, every regret, needing her to realize that he hadn't meant to hurt her. He had been afraid of his own feelings for the girl that was too young especially when he was so messed up.

She didn't break eye contact until Ezra moved her in another direction and Jason had to see her ex teacher's happy face as he smiled down at the girl in his arms and Jason felt a stab in his heart. He turned his eyes from the couple once again pretending a fascination with the watered-down punch Spencer had brought over for him earlier. It wasn't until he heard a chair being pulled out that he realized Aria and Ezra had come back to the table, but only Aria sat down. Ezra decided to go get refreshments for himself and his girlfriend even though told him she didn't want anything. Noel asked Alison to dance and for the first time since the night he got back he, Aria was not surrounded by the girls or hanging onto Ezra.

Jason tried to swallow the lump that seemed to be stuck in his throat, licking suddenly dry lips. Aria fidgeted in her seat and looked desperately toward her boyfriend who had been stopped on the way to the refreshment table and was currently engaged in conversation with a former colleague and none of the girls seemed to be coming back anytime soon.

As is accepting her fate Aria gave him a brittle smile. "Are you enjoying yourself?" She asked knowing the answer even before she asked, trying to remain as impersonal as possible. As far as she could remember Jason had never attended his own school dances so it was highly unlikely he was enjoying his sisters' high school dance one of which he had to escort in order for her to attend. Alison had been complaining about it all week especially since she would have had a date.

Jason's eyes were like green flames as he looked at the girl he desperately wanted to hold. "You know the answer to that already, Aria. School dances were never my thing, but having to watch you in his arms is killing me! It should be me, I should be the one..." Jason stopped too choked up to continue.

"Don't say things like that." Aria told him in a heated voice.

"Why not, it's the truth. Why are you with him Aria? You don't think I see the way you look at me when you think no one is looking?"

Aria's chair scraped the floor as she stood quickly to walk away, "I don't have to sit here and listen to this." She said as she stormed out of the winter themed auditorium Jason following close behind.

"You're not running away this time, Aria. We need to talk. I know you have feelings for me and I love you." He told her his voice as angry as hers had been.

"Really?" She scoffed her arms crossed in a haughty matter as she tried to look down at him even though she was still inches shorter than him regardless on the heels she was wearing. "And when did you come to this conclusion, before or after you left without even so much as a 'kiss my ass, Aria', maybe you had this awakening when you got home." She said sarcastically her angry face now as close to being in his as her height would allow, eyes brownish green with rage.

Jason crowded his face into hers now just as angry as her. Dammit he had just wanted a chance to talk to her, to explain, but it was turning into a shouting match instead, Jason caught a flicker of desire in her eyes, it had been quick, but it was there. Jason hauled her into his arms, his mouth capturing her in an angry, but desperate caress. Her arms had uncrossed and were clutching his shoulders desperately even before his lips had touched hers. Jason slammed her back against the wall his body following. His moved over hers demanding and she opened her mouth for him and his marauding tongue, kissing her breathless. Her fingers tangled in his hair clenching the strands tight pressing his mouth more firmly to hers. Finally, their lungs screaming in desperate need of oxygen, they drug their kisses bruised and swollen lips apart looking into each other's eyes as greedy lungs drug in as much oxygen as they could before she pulled his mouth back to hers. Lips and hands demanding, angry, hungry.

Jason maneuvered a knee under her skirt and between her thighs, she tightened them and with a strangled moan began writhing on it, wet and hot for him. "Aria, let's get out of here." He said in a strained voice, he knew they needed to really talk, that he needed to explain, but he wasn't sure how much longer he could last without fucking her senseless right here against this wall were anyone could walk up on them.

His words had the same effect on her as a bucket of ice water being thrown in her face. And with a strength that surprised both of them she pushed him from her. "Stop, just stop."

He ran shaking hands through his hair trying to regain some composure he opened his mouth meaning to calmly explain everything, but that wasn't what came tumbling out his voice and words far from calm

"Aria," he practically begged, his husky voice desperate, "please tell me there is still a place for me in your life. Tell me that I still have your heart, don't make me leave. I'll do anything to be with you, I love you I always have. Don't push me away!" For a few seconds Aria looked like she was beginning to soften toward him, but he seen her spine stiffen as did her resolve. Angry and hurt Jason blurted out, "Why can't you give me another chance, you gave Fitz another chance. I never meant to hurt you. Was my mistake so much worse than what he did?"

"Yes Jason, it was." Aria looked at him with cold eyes. She thought he knew about what Ezra had done. It had been horrible, he had used her, stalked them and lied about knowing Alison. Then he came so close to dying and he kept begging Aria to forgive him and she didn't know if he would make it especially after Shana poisoned him and she felt there was nothing else she could do. She told him she loved him, that she had missed him, that she wanted to be with him. After he made it the girls told her he deserved a second chance after what he did for them so Aria kept what she thought was going to be a deathbed promise. Despite everything Ezra had done, in her eyes what Jason had done was still worse. She watched as realization of her worlds sat in, watched as his eyes clouded up in confusion and hurt.

"Aria I was afraid, I was so messed up, I didn't know if I had hurt Alison and you were so young." He began babbling in anxiety afraid he had lost her and there was nothing he could do to change anything.

"Don't you get it Jason? What you did was worse because no matter what Ezra did he never had the power to break me like you did, I was humiliated really, more than hurt. Ezra can't hurt me like you can because a I could never love him or anyone like I do you!" she practically screamed at him. Then the heard a gasp and the sound of something hitting the floor. They both turned to see a white-faced Ezra, red punch puddled at his feet like spilled blood and two now empty plastic cups shifting back and forth on the floor. "Ezra!" He pivoted and took off down the hall faster than Aria thought he was capable of.

They had been so intent on each other, they hadn't heard the footsteps coming down the hallway. Ezra had finished talking to the ex-colleague and had went to get refreshments for himself and Aria she didn't want. When he turned to head back to the table he seen her, leaving the auditorium, he had tried to catch up, but he was too far away and he kept getting stopped by former students and coworkers. When he finally reached the hallway, he heard raised voices one sounding like it could be Aria's and he had followed the sound. He had just gotten close enough to see who she was arguing with just as she said that he could never hurt her because she could never love him or anyone like she did Jason. Ezra stood in shock, the cups of punch he had still been carrying falling from his hands.

Aria gave Jason a dirty look before she took off after Ezra. Jason started to follow, but decided it was best to leave her alone for now. With a defeated sigh, he leaned back against the wall feeling very old and very tired until her words replayed in his mind and realized that Aria had inadvertently told him she loved him. He doubted she realized it, but her words were present, not past tense. No longer feeling as defeated he went to the nearest bathroom and got paper towel to clean up the mess, hoping that soon he could clean up the mess he had made of things.

~Fin~

Notes: Sorry I had to change that dress Aria wore to the winter ball. First off, I really hated it, I know everyone else probably thought it was beautiful, but I thought it was tacky and unflattering. Tacky, but flattering I could overlook, but I personally thought the dress was a total fail on all counts and did nothing to flatter Lucy/Aria. I even though the hair was awful. Secondly, I found the fact the stalker she kept dating for some ridiculous reason, buying her outfit she was to wear, as if she didn't know how to dress herself, was super creepy not to mention condescending to her parents, as if they couldn't afford a nice dress for their daughter. There is a whole lot of stuff I find disturbing and dysfunctional and creepy about Ezria so enough of my soap box, since I could spend hours complaining about how awful I think Ezria really is. Anyhoo, let me know what you think.

Thanx for reading  
GrimLi 😘


	3. Slow Burn

Synopsis: What happened at the winter formal?

Another sequel Could Have Been Love, when I am not so lazy I will move these to their own file since there is now three parts to this.

Characters: Jason DiLaurentis, Aria Montgomery, Alison DiLaurentis, Spencer Hastings, Emily Fields, Hanna Marin, Garret Reynolds

Pairings: Jason/Aria

Song Inspiration: Slow Burn by Apocalyptically.

Note: Jason was gone he knows nothing about A, who is still very much a presence in the girl's life.

Warning: this is a rough draft for the most part, but I did fix some errors and stuff, hope it is a little less confusing.

Slow Burn

**January 2012**  
Jason felt like his flesh was burning it was like a fast-furious flame rapidly consumes all it comes in contacts with. No this was like a slow burn, slow, sizzling, smoldering from shoulder to thigh where her body touched his, the embers of his desire for her was licking his skin and when he turns to look at her he knows that he isn't the only one who feels it, they've had these feelings and need for each other for so long, Before it was appropriate he was fighting these feeling, ignoring them acting as if he felt nothing for her, lying to himself and then she came to him that night.

A night he had felt so lost and was so close to giving up. She had been his salvation that night. She had saved him from the rapid fires of addiction and self-loathing, had saved him from fear. He lied to himself even that night, even as he begged her to stay with him in his arms. A part of him that he ignored was screaming to beg her to stay with him forever. But he had been unable to ignore the ache and the slow burn of the desire that had ignited when she held him in her arms and he kissed her and she had responded as if she had always been his lover, as if she were his. Not his sister's fifteen-year-old friend, until she stopped him because of her lack of experience, he was still burning with need and desire for her even as he feel asleep almost immediately from exhaustion.

The nightmares were held at bay, even in his dreams that night he was dreaming of their bodies burning together as he made love to her and she promised never to leave, never to fade away. The morning come and he reached for her, but she was gone as if it had all been a dream except he, could smell her oh his pillow and his clothes. It was faint, but he could smell the traces of lavender soothing his soul until reality set in and he realized he was in love with her and it scared the hell out of him and he ran away.

It took him over two years, but he had come home. He came back because his sister had been found, he come back to sisters he didn't even know he had. But, he had come home to Aria as he always meant to do. He, Spencer and Alison were bonding, growing closer every day and now he had Aria too. Life felt so close to perfect he was afraid he might wake up. He turned his head and looked at her she smiled at him telling him she loved him leaning to kiss his jawbone and trail kisses down the side of his neck causing the flesh to prickle with desire keeping his eyes trained on the road he angled his head and she captured his lips with hers in a quick, but passionate kiss .

"Eww gross, do we really have to see that," Alison and Spencer exclaimed jokingly. Jason and Aria chuckled as she laid her head against his shoulder wishing they were alone like they had planned

They were heading to the lake, Jason got a new camera he and Aria wanted to try out. Alison overheard him telling Jessica and she had wanted to come, obviously, and bring her friends. He had said no, but Alison had gotten her way and he had to wait for them, Garrett had showed up and decided to come along as well. Aria as usual was the last to arrive and when he seen her he forgot that he was aggravated with Ali, her friends and Garrett only focusing on his girl. She almost tripped over her long skirt as she ran apologizing for making him wait, but he didn't care he would wait forever for her if he had to, when she was close enough he wrapped her in his arms kissing her, almost afraid to let her go.

When they reached the lake, they piled out of the car and Garrett went to do his own thing. Jason thought his sisters and the other two girls would do their own thing so he and Aria could be alone, but Alison had other plans demanding he take pictures of her and the girls instead. He finally gave in just to get her to shut up, he lifted the camera and aimed, but something was wrong. The girls all looked younger, like they were thirteen he looked at Aria and she was also younger and she was fading. He grabbed her arm begging him not to leave him, but she disappeared even as he tried to pull him to here. As he called for her to come back to him, his sisters and the other girls began to disappear also. Jason was screaming for Aria, he was afraid and alone, his body on fire. He jerked awake his head throbbing as he set up beneath the pictures taken so long ago, his dream had incorporated that day with the mess he made of things with Aria, she hadn't been with him at all. His mind going back to that day that was partially responsible for changing his life even though he didn't know it at the time.

**July 2007**  
It had been a few days before his eighteenth birthday, before he moved on to hard liquor and even harder drugs, before the NAT club disintegrated into an excuse for Ian and Garrett to film minor girls in various stages of dress and opportunistically spying on neighbors during indelicate moments. Jason and Garrett finding themselves with nothing to do decided to head out to the lake. His mom had given him his birthday gift early, she had bought him a camera he had been eyeing for several months and he wanting to try it out at the lake thinking he could get some great shots of the lake and surrounding forest.

Alison overhearing him telling their mom obviously she wanted to go with him and bring her friends as well. He told her no, not wanting to be bothered by the group of giggling girls he referred to as the Power Puff Girls, but as usual she got her way and he much to his annoyance found himself having to wait until the girls arrive.

As usual Aria was the last to arrive. Ali, Spencer, Hanna and Emily had already piled in the back seat by the time Aria got there. Garrett was already sitting in the front and Jason was looking at his watch an annoyed look on his face. Aria stumbled an apology almost tripping on her long skirt as she hurried out of breath to the car before noticing where she would have to sit. Jason rolled his eyes in exasperation. He knew Aria had a crush on him and was surprised Alison hadn't figured it out. She wasn't trying to entice him with her feminine wiles, but it was hard to miss with all the blushing and stammering if he was forced to talk to her. When he was around she tended to look down at her shoes. Already slightly clumsy as a result she would trip and almost fall. If Garrett and Ian wouldn't make such a big fucking deal out of the little goth girl crushing on him it would actually be kind of cute.

Jason got in after Aria, rolling his eyes once again when he seen her blushing when his elbow accidentally brushed against her arm when he started the car. Tt could be worse, he reasoned, she could be trying to chase after him which had happened with of few of Ali's friends in the past. But in the past Alison's friends had been like her aggressive and vindictive and it had been easy to be as ignorant as he had to be to get them to leave him alone, but these four girls were very different from Alison and not so easy to be an asshole to.

The girls in the back were giggling hysterically and Garrett was picking at them causing Hanna and Emily to blush, Spencer give him a disapproving stare and Ali was smirking as if she knew something the rest of them didn't. Annoyed with the noise and having to deal with the car full of people he didn't want Jason turned up his radio. Much to Alison's annoyance he wouldn't switch it to the pop station she listened to and groaned, following suit the other girls groaned as well, except for Aria, who quietly sang along surprising Jason that she knew the Joy Division. He had thought that like his sister she was into Miley Cyrus and the Jonas Brothers and the way she dressed was just for attention.

When they got to the lake, Garrett quickly went off to score some action, this could be beer or babes though he was hoping for both. Jason expected the girls to do the same and apparently so had the others, but Ali had other ideas, demanding that Jason take photos of her and the girls. Her four friends looked uncomfortable with the idea, but eventually they agreed because Ali had to have her way. Jason refused, but she whined and complained following him around until he finally agreed to get her to shut up and leave him alone.

He took a few group shots of them and a couple of each girl individually, but most of them were of Alison who loved having her picture taken even it her friends weren't so keen on the idea, By the time she was satisfied he has used up almost all of one of the rolls he had brought.

He had been walking around about an hour using a black and white when he seen her standing alone as if in a world of her own. Aria had a habit of wandering off alone so it wasn't a complete shock to see her alone now, but it was the first time Jason had every really noticed how beautiful she was. Her face free of her usual dark makeup, long dark hair glistening in the sun as she looked off in the distance, she turned to look out over the lake as the breeze off the lake ruffling her hair and skirt, she raised on hand to hold her hair back; he didn't realize it yet, but that was the moment Jason DiLaurentis had fallen a little in love with Aria Montgomery. Without thought of why he was doing it Jason snapped the photo and two more after it, the shots were amazingly beautiful shots in their simplicity and the feelings that had just blossomed to life were somehow evident in those pictures.

When he developed the film, they were his favorite pictures he had taken in a long time, maybe ever. Her face was hidden from view no one would ever know it was Aria or that he had taken them he reasoned as he packed them up to take to the framers along with a couple landscapes he had been meaning to have framed. He bundled up the rest of the pictures he had taken of Alison and the Power Puff Girls giving them to her before he headed to get his pictures framed.

**Present**

After that day Jason stuffed the feelings that had awakened down and only revisited them in occasional dreams when his subconscious was in control. When he would be awakened if he remembered them he pretended they meant nothing and erase them from his mind in the same manner he did all his problems. By the time she came to him that night he was a pro at pretending he felt nothing for Aria, but after waking up the morning after he had fallen asleep in her arms he could no longer pretend, the floodgates of his feelings for her had burst open he ran scared and now he was paying for that move.

It had been weeks since the debacle that was the winter formal. Christmas had come and gone as had New Year's Day and all without getting a chance to speak to Aria. She was no longer even coldly polite. He had thought that after her admission things would become easier, but she only pushed him further away. His only comfort was that she and Ezra were no longer together.

He didn't know what was said after she took off, but by the time he went back to the dance she was back pointedly ignoring him until her mother came to pick her up. The girls had tried to talk her into staying, Alison even joking that she would happily share her "date" giving Jason a pointed look as if his parents forcing him to escort her was somehow his fault. Jason would have been more than happy to be shared with Aria, but the idea hadn't set well with her at all. Apparently, it was his fault that Ezra had overheard her screaming that she could never love Ezra like she did him.

Jason hear a knock on his door and Alison came in carrying and new bottle of water and his antibiotics and the other medication the doctor had prescribed. "Hey sleepy head, feeling any better?" Jason had been sick with the flu for four days and Alison and Spencer were getting worried and their parents were out of town. She felt his head and he was burning up, Alison had gotten sick first and had given it to him when he was taking care of her. Jason started to get up but she scolded him and told him he needed to stay in bed, he lifted a weak hand and gestured he needed to use the bathroom when his voice came out in a hoarse whisper hurting his throat. Alison nodded and helped him regain his balance when he stumbled.

Jason groaned his body aching as he painstakingly made his way to the bathroom and then back to his bed. He felt like crying not only because he felt like crap, but because everything was just so messed up. With a glance at the pictures that he had hung over his bed almost five years ago, it was the only way he could be close to her then and now. He closed his eyes again trying to sleep, but the same images that had tormented him over the last couple years flashed through his mind, but newer, more painful memories now joined them. At least in the old ones Aria trusted him and held him in her arms offering everything in her eyes, in the newer ones she would respond until she remembered what he had done and push him away. Sleep seemed pointless and he tried to sit up, but was too week and the he heard the voices in the hall way.

He recognized the voices of his sisters, Aria, Hanna and Emily their tone worried and desperate. Something was going on with them, but he hadn't figured it out yet, they each had a haunted look as though they were afraid something terrible was about to happen, he had asked his sisters, but they laughed telling him he was imagining things. He had never been particularly close to Emily and Hanna and Aria was no longer even coldly polite to him, she was openly ignored his very existence so asking her anything wouldn't work. As he tried to concentrate on their words his head grew dense and foggy and he feel back to sleep.

Jason tossed and turned his mind reliving the events of the past; of the day at the lake and how he pretended she annoyed him, when Aria came to him after Alison disappeared and he ran away from her and then coming home to her only for her to reject him. He dreamed about seeing her with Ezra and about the dance holding her in his arms kissing her and her screaming that she could never love anyone like she loved him. With each remembered embrace his mind begs her not to leave him his body is sizzling a slow aching burn consuming him and then he dreams of lavender and she holds him once again in her arms. Even in his tortured sleep, tears running down his face he begs for her not to leave him.

She holds him closer telling him she loves him that she always will that she wished she could stay with him forever. She is still caressing his back gently, telling him she never wants to leave him as she gently places kisses across his lips, eyes, and forehead he wants to kiss her back, but he is too weak, it is as if his limbs and head weigh thousands of pounds each and he can't lift them, she tells him to relax. She cradles his head to her chest and whispers in his ear, telling him again she loves and asks him to be patient, she says that as soon as it is safe she will be come to him and they can finally be together. it was a promise and now Jason settles down as her hands run soothing circles down his back and he breathes in lavender, he never wants to wake again.

But he does wake up. The next morning, his fever is down some. He had slept better than he had in a long time. He thinks it is because he dreamed Aria held him all night telling him she loved him, now he is awake, reality sets in and he is alone. It was all a dream. He rolls over burying his head into the other pillows seeking the coolness they would provide against hot skin when he catches a scent. He pulls it closer breathing in the scent of lavender and Aria. His eyes popped open, it hadn't all been a dream, but she was gone. He desperately tries to remember what she told him, but because of the high fever his mind was in too much of a fog and her words have faded away just as her scent clinging to his pillows, covers and his skin would soon fade too.

Fin

*****************************  
Notes: not completely happy with this, I had too many thought running through my head making me feel almost as confused as Jason is supposed to be,  
Because I suck at describing clothes, with the help of some outfits already put together on polyvore and piecing together what I liked, here is what I envision Aria wearing that day,

I think it is apparent to anyone that has read more than a couple of my stories that I have an obsessive need for a back story, in order to try to keep even one shots from becoming overwhelming I often add the backstory of my fanfics to the notes and with that being said...

In case anyone is wondering... Since Jason and his family were both gone until Alison came back he knows nothing about A, who is still very much a presence in the girl's life. On the note of he and his family being MIA for over 2 years, his parents are divorced, but with Ali's return are trying to work things out and they never sold the house. Maybe they leased it to them for a year if you want imagine Maya still a part of Emily's life or they bought a different house. 😁 Because of the time frame I haven't even thought of her until just now when I started writing up the notes.

When the liars came back with Alison she and the girls tried to tell the police everything, but they didn't believe them thinking Shana was some mentally unstable girl obsessed with Alison's life. Security footage from the theatre proved her death was accidental because it was apparent Aria never meant to kill her and that it was in defense, she was after all holding a gun on the girl's. Ezra told police she shot him and tried to poison him, and they were able to match the ballistics from the gun Shana had threatening the girls with to the bullet that Ezra was shot with, (I like to tie up loose ends that I think about in my mind when starting a story and thought I'd share my thought process with you)

Also, unlike the show, Alison and the girls are united not back stabbing each other and Alison has really changed, but she kept that something that made her uniquely Ali just without the blackmail and bullying. She and Emily are not a thing, Emily may have had a crush, but Alison sees Emily only as a friend (to Emission fans, I am sorry, but I don't think I can write Alison/Emily, the pairing never inspired me, and I never shipped them at all. I would apologize to Ezria fans since that is another pairing I can't write, but I doubt if Ezria fans read anything I write anyway.) I don't know if A is Charlotte in this story, but A is still around and Noel is not a part of the A-team. I think he might have a crush on the not so cruel Alison in this story, so definitely not trying to help torment her or her friends. Oh, there is no Holbrook/Alison, he is a good detective trying to ignore Hanna's crush (should have added this to the notes at the end of Hole in My Soul). So, I think that answers any loose ends someone may have, at least any I thought of.

And In case it was not clear in my garbled rambling of a one shot, A is messing with all the girls love lives in some way Caleb and Paige because they won't stop snooping.  
Thanks for reading  
GrimLi


End file.
